Lately my prayer life has been to focus completely on God and on spiritual things. A “seeking of those things which are above and setting my mind on things above and not on things of the earth” It’s been a really enriching time in my life as I attempt to just completely focus on spiritual matters and not earthly matters.
I wake up early and go let my dogs out of the shop and then I get into a hammock I have hanging on my deck. There, I worship and commune with the Father. Watching the day slowly break and listening to the birds chirp in the trees. It’s pretty cool actually.
Each day I have given our church a particular scripture or part of a scripture to just meditate on and pray over for our lives. One day this week the verse was from Philippians 4:6. You know,
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. “
It’s amazing that just the day before God had begun to fill my heart with thanksgiving. So that morning I was already in “thanksgiving” mode and I really focused on that part of the verse. Then it happened ….. God set my heart on another part of the verse. He put it in my mind.
“… let your requests be made known to God.”
There it was. My requests. Make known my requests. I was paralyzed. I couldn’t pray. I was sort of shocked. Oh, it’s not that I’m so spiritual, believe me. Anyone who knows me can attest to that. It’s also not that I don’t have any requests. I do. They were right there on the tip of my tongue and in the front of my mind.
It’s just that I’ve been there all too often. Praying my requests. Asking my desires. Often even receiving the answers I desired. Only to be left still unfulfilled and dissatisfied spiritually. The week had been so fulfilling with just worship that I couldn’t do it. Maybe God is showing me it’s time. Maybe I needed to see where my heart is. I’m not sure. But I was paralyzed in the moment of prayer.
Now before you all start sending me comments and scriptures about prayer and the great privilege we have as God’s children to bring our requests to Him. Please know that I am not in any way even suggesting that we shouldn’t or can’t. I know the scriptures. I am preaching through John and I have just finished chapter 14 and begun chapter 15 where Jesus clearly says that we have this awesome privilege to ask anything in His Name when we are abiding in Him and His word in us. I’m not denying that … I’m just sharing an incident from my walk with God. Maybe you can relate, maybe not. Maybe it means nothing to anyone, but it does to me. I certainly don’t think I have any special insight into this spiritual journey that others do not. I’m just an old man …. who’s not sure he even knows how to pray anymore…. but that’s the way I see it.